Rubbing dirt on my clothes

The only pill I take is a low dose aspirin.Most of the time I forget it.The bottle is sitting on the computer so I can be reminded to take it.Let me count.I am suppose to be taking 3 more pills each day but I just gave them up.One for my diabetes ,one for blood pressure and another for cholesterol.Oh I do take over the counter pills for pain every once in a while.Never in my life was I a pill taker.Never was I one to go to the doctor either.When I was a little boy if my Daddy told me to keep my clothes clean we had some where to go after getting home from school I took that to mean you are going to the doctor and that means shots and that means pain.I think going to the doctor was one of my worst fears.Honest it still is.I always afraid they will find something and me personally if I got something that is going to kill me I would rather not know.Just let in slip up on me I say.The doctor sent me to the heart clinic here for what do you call it...a sonogram or something like that.Anyway it is the ultra sound thing they do with your heart.I got a call that an appointment to see a cardiologist had been made for me.Heck I did not go.I do know that my ticker beats way to fast but what ever else is wrong if I don't know about it I won't worry right?Now back to when I was a little boy.Like I said if I thought I was going to be taken to the doctor and I do mean taken no way would I go easy I would run under the house.hide and rub dirt all over my clean clothes.Sometimes that worked other times well.People in my family die of two things.Cancer or heart attacks.Neither is pleasant.So these days I am just letting nature take it's course.I think that our lives have been planned out from second one of our life.What will happen will.Why fight it.Don't get me wrong,like my Daddy said when he was on his death bed everyone wants to live as long as they can.I sure do.I just don't want to suffer a long painful death.Make mine quick please,no time for me to suffer or be scared if all possible.Oh well it is something we all will face someday.I don't even know how I got on this subject.Gee hope I haven't depressed you to much.Ok enough of this thinking.Let's have another cup of coffee.