Sad

One of those days.Song will hit me and sad I get.Just because by Ray Charles did it this time.I used to never be this way.Now I’m so emotional about some things.Bam out of nowhere I feel like crying.Male PMS maybe.Could be my sugar acting up it will make us men folk get emotional.At Momma’s funeral back in 2003 I was doing ok till.Till that one song was sung.Amazing Grace.Maybe why it hit me so hard was Momma loved that song.Even though she didn’t remember who I was or where she was she could still sing that song.I’m not ashamed of being emotional now.It is me.I will be ok.

Ray Charles - Just Because

Dead folks in my dreams

I dream.Sometimes a connection between what is dreamed and my life can be seen.Other times it’s completely off the wall and all I can say is hmm where that come from.The dreams I have mostly are of my dead family members.Every once in awhile a living person will show up with them and I ask myself why is so and so here because everyone else in the dream is dead.I don’t mind the dead visiting me in my dreams.They are family.Let me explain something.They talk to me but not with their mouths.It’s like telepathic communication.They talk I listen.Sometimes back at the old place there would be a room full of people in my dream.Nothing scary fact is it was very peaceful and nice seeing them again.Like a family reunion but everyone is dead.Maybe all this has to do with me being hit in the head with a brick as a young boy.I don’t know and really don’t worry about it.So I will never say to you see ya in my dreams.You would be dead.

Honest person

Little white lies.We have all done it.Sometimes it the easy way out rather than being honest.I want to stop it myself.Maybe instead of saying anything a smile instead of the little lie.Little lies can add up.I’m really trying to be more honest.Some things have changed in my old age some things remain the same but just for me my own benefit I’m going to try being a more honest person.And this no lie.

Smokey Joe’s, Jacobs and Pete the ice cream man

Smokey Joe’s,Jacobs and Pete the ice cream man.

Not many reading this will know what those three are so I shall explain.

Smokey Joe’s was a hamburger joint located up the street from Grandma Smith’s house,so was Jacobs which was an old time grocery store.

Smokey’s place sit on the side of a steep hill and had stairs that would terrify me if I had to walk them today.He served only hamburgers.What I remember the most there was always a huge jar of dill pickles on the counter.Not the little ones but large pickles.

.Now comes in the Jacobs part of the story.Grandma was always sending one of us grand kids to the store for something.I can still see inside with my mind what the store look liked.Wooden floors and the employees all wore those long white aprons.Anyway Grandma would always say what ever change is left over is yours.Back in those days a penny would buy candy or a cookie.

Sometimes there would be enough change left over to walk next door to  Smokey Joe’s and buy a hamburger and a big dill pickle.

Now for Pete the ice cream man.He would always be at shift changing time at Kex mill across the street in the summer time.If I was lucky I would walk down where the folks where waiting for shift change and my Uncle Eugene would buy me a Popsicle.A banana or coconut where the prize flavors.

Smith cousins do you remember this?

Bet you do.

Spirits in the house

This is an old house.Many people have lived and died here I imagine.A description of the house.It looks like a old time farm house.12 foot ceilings 8 foot high windows.One night I was in bed and awaken by someone calling my name.Someone said John one time.It sure sounded Like Momma.This has happened two other times in my life once when I was a small boy and an another time since I’ve been an adult.Momma always said never answer them and I don’t.Another night I woke to the sound of a woman singing what I would call a lullaby like a Mother would sing to a baby.Soon as I woke it stopped.Laying here in bed about 10 pm I heard someone praying. I thought someone in the next room was praying.They asked me if I was praying answering I said no,thought it was you I said.We both agreed it was like a chant maybe like Indians would chant.It was in a language not understood.Alone in the house with the sun shinning brightly I heard the backdoor open,sounds of footsteps and a woman calling someone named Clare.Walking right pass  the room I was in but nothing seen.Around supper time I have noticed the smell of pipe tobacco.It was like some one had finished supper and now enjoying a smoke.At times in the kitchen people have heard old time baseball games on what must have been a radio.It was like maybe someone from the past was sitting at the table listening to a game.One night I was awaken by the feeling of something in the room with me.I could not see it but felt like it was something evil and it scared me.I started praying help me Jesus over and over.It left.Since that night nothing has been heard.So maybe what ever it was or who ever has found peace and moved on.

Cold day

A cold day in Alabama.The temp is some where between 16 and 23 degrees.All depends where you look.Really doesn’t make much difference cold is cold.I’m fairly comfortable just my typing hand feels froze.Yes I am a one hand one finger typist.I took typing in high school for three days.It was so boring so changed it to wood shop.Took me a whole year to build a gun rack.I think maybe sticking out typing would been the better choice.Sure would come in handy these days.

Quitting smoking

Have you made any New Year resolutions ? I don’t make them cause they are never kept.One thing I have done is quit smoking.5 years now.Cold turkey.Ran out of smokes one day and just gave it up.It was not easy but really not very hard.I can now smell a smoke from across the street.I never smelled them before I guess because I grew up in a house of smokers.I am not one of those hypocrites about it.I know a smoke and coffee have gotten me through some rough times in my life.So I better than anyone know the need for smoking.I will be honest every once in awhile I think how nice a smoke would be.A little Hav A Tampa cigar with a cup of McDonalds coffee,black please no sugar,but I will stick it out.

Foul up a good thing

New Years day classic meal.Here for supper there was blackeye peas,collards and cornbread.I not sure about it bringing good luck or anything but it sure taste good.I like collards and turnip greens.Raised on food like that.Got to have some cornbread with your vegetables that rounds it out.Some say I’m set in my ways,wont try anything new but I just know what I like and why foul up a good thing.

My email

Hi everyone.If you would like to contact me my email is johnleehaynes@yahoo.com

Gail Janice and me

When I was a small boy going to my cousin Gail's house was always fun.We are the same age and as kids we played great together.Cowboys,Indians,riding bikes,climbing trees yep Gail  was a tom boy.Her Mom Pauline would take us to Grants Park where the zoo was.My favorite place to go was the airport.Back then you just drove up to the fence and watched the big planes.They lived in Jonesboro yep Clayton County where gone with the wind took place in the movie.There is a Tara Blouvard there but no real Tara.We got along good for cousins.I remember one thing though.Gail and our other cousin Janice would let me play as long it was just me and the other.But get them two togather it was no way hosea they would shut the door in my face and I would end up sitting on Grandma’s porch steps alone.Janice told me something a few years ago.Grandma had an apple tree.Janice asked if I remembered being payed 25 cents to pick up apples.I do remember picking up apples .But being payed was something I never heard about.So I’m thinking some sort  of conspiracy about the apple picking up was going on and maybe further investigation is needed.

Po kids

Gladys,Daddy,Fred and J.D.Daddy said they were so poor when in bed at night they could look up and see the stars,look down and see the chickens under the house..He was the baby boy of the family,Ruby his sister was the baby of the group.He had 3 other sisters,Myrtle,Gertrude and Eula.Once he told me how he felt when at school in his lunch pail all he had was sorghum syrup and cold cornbread and the other kids had sandwiches using sliced bread.On Christmas they got an orange and apple.He would save the peelings for later.A habit I have.They all got one pair of shoes each year and if they wore out they went barefooted. 

141 am New Years eve morning

141 am New Years eve morning Roanoke,Alabama.I can’t sleep.Out comes the computer and I will write a bit.What to write about that makes sense not figured out yet.Tried sleeping but it didn’t work well.Just turned the electric heater on .A little bit chilly plus the sound of it running I like.The glow of it in a dark room is nice.Let your imagination kick in and pretend it’s the glow of a camp fire with that  aroma of burning wood.Now I hungry.The old camp out staple would hit the spot right now.A can of Armour chili with beans some soda crackers and for drink how about a real Coke.Need something sweet to make this the perfect camp out meal.Let me think for a second.Ok after much thought,for the sweet thing of the meal how about Bit O Honey.Zagnut or Clark bar .Sugar Daddys or Babies?Shoot a lot of that old type candy is not around any more.While on the subject throw in the fire a few potatoes and let the hot coals bake them to perfection.Wish I had not started on this subject ,it’s making me really hungry.Ok,guess that’s enough.It is now 203 am New Years eve Roanoke,Alabama.

A fine looking couple

Ada Dicy Smith Haynes and Harold Winford Haynes.My parents.They met at Ideal Cleaners on Greenville Street in LaGrange,Georgia where Momma worked as a cashier.I was an only child.That’s not an easy job.Brothers and sisters I always wanted.Still I wish for them. For you that have siblings consider yourself blessed.

Just another memory

I miss my home.Every time I hear a train whistle I’m wishing I was there.Thought it would be ok giving up the old place but lately I dream of it wanting to be back.Back where my life was.Back where my memories are.Back to where the people I loved lived.It’s gone, just another memory.

I do try

Ok I’m not perfect.Lot of things I do are regretted and make me feel guilty.My conscious has always kept me in check about things.Sometimes things are thought through and sometimes they are done on a whim.Better thinking through things before acting on them believe me.Saves a lot of trouble.The Bible said if you think about it you are just as guilty as doing it.I’m in trouble.Some things never acted on but sure thought about.We are all sinners and fall short the Bible said.I know that is my case.The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak.All I can do is ask forgiveness for my sins and try to live more Christ like but I know sooner or later I will mess up big time again.

The Timex

The Timex.When I was a little boy my folks often had to work nights.This meant I had to stay with relatives . I was always treated nice by everyone but it was very lonely.Often I would put my Timex watch up against my ear listening to the tick tick tick.The soothing sound was a comfort to me. Today in my old age I think a Timex is still need.

Let me complain

Things with my health are getting worse.Not complaining here it’s something to write about when nothing else comes into my mind Let me be honest guess I am complaining. Maybe it will help someone out there going through this part of their life.I don’t think I have gave up completely yet.There is still life in me.My brain is still working even if I do have senior moments from time to time.My body is wearing out wasting away from the Kulgleburg Welander Syndrome elcrapo thing and being diabetic doesn’t help at all.I’m not walking anymore.The bed is where I stay mostly.Thank God for this adjustable bed it has been a blessing from God.My power chair has also been a blessing and the patient lift has made things so much easier.After last December 2010 when I ended up in the hospital really was the start of it all going down hill.It just knocked me down and I guess giving up seemed like the easy thing to do. For a long time sitting up was impossible I have heard people say the room is spinning Well when sitting up whew boy it was like a carnival ride.Nausea every time and a few times I thought I would just lay down in the floor and die,it was that bad. I have to depend on people now for just about everything.I hate being a burden.I know what the future holds.Several times I have made up my mind about going to a nursing home.I don’t really want to go but sooner or later I have to give it serious thinking.Some pain now when being moved.My knee on the right leg seems to be frozen and it doesn’t want to bend.Maybe I’m being a big baby but it hurts.That is one reason I don’t use the power wheelchair as much.Hurts just sitting in it with the knee problem.My hips I’m sure have been knocked out of place from all the falls I taken over the years.Some pain at times with them.I use to never worry about this but everything just started happening so quick.I could walk and take care of myself and having to have others help does take away from my pride or ego call it what you want.Some say everything has been planned out from the start for each of our life.I really don’t know.All I know is it sure gets hard at times just keeping going on.

First cup of the day

That first cup of coffee of the day is the best. After that none quite taste as good. I have heard people say your taste changes as you get older.I know for a fact our hearing,sight and a few other things change with age so stands to reason our taste does also.If I make it to June 24^th 2012 I will be 60 years old.Being old does have it’s advantages.We get senior citizen discounts at fast food places and on Tuesdays we old folks get 10% discount at the grocery store on the stuff we buy that doesn’t taste like it did in our younger days .

After midnight

After midnight and I’m tired but can’t sleep.Raining heavy and the sound of it beating down on the roof is soothing.The rain is bringing cooler weather.I feel it in my bones.I must have dozed off for a few minutes because I woke up to the sound of me snoring.A few times I’ve awaken to me talking to someone.That is a strange feeling.Who was it I wonder.Other than the rain nothing is heard in the house.This clamp on lamp I’m using on the bed is wonderful.A big improvement over the little battery powered light.The computer is always close by incase the need to write strikes me.Sleepy now plus pain in my hip wont stop so think I’ll call it a night.

Reading the Bible

I read the Bible.The more reading the more I understand.Not saying everything is understood but it’s starting to make sense now.I was raised Baptist.Maybe I have different view points on the Bible than you.One thing I’m not clear on 100% is death.More than once the Bible calls it sleep.I know some say when we die we are judged at that time on our life and what we have done.The result being Heaven or Hell.The Bible said that Jesus will come back with his angels and the dead in Christ will rise first into the sky with him,then everyone else will follow with the angels doing the judging.The rapture.Some don’t believe in it.I believe in the rapture myself.It is never mentioned by that word in the Bible.So maybe when we die it’s just a deep sleep and our souls will be judged at the rapture.Jesus and the disciples raised people from the dead.If their souls where in Heaven why would they be brought back.Lazarus was raised from the dead.His sisters said he has been dead 4 days and he stinketh but Jesus brought him back to life.And when Jesus was crucified there where long dead Saints seen walking around.People say they have had near death experiences.They see a bright light.A Holy being.Family members that have passed on.I’m not saying what's right and what's not cause I don’t know.This a subject for deep thought in those quite moments.One day we shall all know the answer.Your comments on this subject as all my other post are most welcomed.I would like to know your viewpoint and insight.

Blustery day

The Crows have been noisy for the past few days.Awaken by their caw caw sounds two days now.Maybe they know something.It looks blustery outside.Low dark clouds and very windy.Rain day and night for several days straight. I think it’s going to blow something in.Maybe a big winter storm.Snow.It’s the day after this was wrote.Guess what?I was wrong.Today there is not a cloud in the sky,sunny no wind.But it’s cold least to me.

Hawks

I have noticed a lot of hawks lately.They just fly around in circles getting higher and higher like little sailplanes.They are quite an enjoyment to me. I seen the most amazing thing.A flock of smaller birds diving and dogging  a hawk.The smaller birds reminded me of a kaleidoscope as they changed patterns in the sky trying to out maneuver the hawk. From my window I watch birds of all kinds.Red birds,male and female.I think there was a love triangle going on between  birds.Two females fighting over the male is what it looked like.The male chose one and where the other female went I don’t know.The result was 1 baby Red bird.Bluejays are fun to watch.They will fight anything including themselves.They even chase the hawks.Crows are plentiful and a pleasure to watch and listen to with their caw caw sound.But the most pleasurable bird of them all in my opinion is the Mocking bird.Their beautiful singing has lullabied me to peaceful sleep many a summers night.So I am a bird watcher and most of all bird listener.

Coming storm

April 27th 2011 I was awaken by the sound of the tornado siren blasting away.It was after 10pm.Rain,thunder and lighting.Laying here in bed I thought of England during WW2.Nightly air raids and those sirens going off.How terrifying it must have been.Reflecting on my life and thinking there is a very good chance of a tornado oddly enough I was at peace with it all.Not scared but just numb to it all.That Friday night 35 people died in Alabama.

Rattlesnakes

Rattlesnakes.Sorry I don’t like them.Any snake for that matter.Dead or live doesn’t make any difference.Living in Standing Rock,Alabama as a boy of 4 years old I had an encounter with a rattler.The front yard was all sand.Walking down the tall steps of the house reaching the bottom step coiled up ready to strike was a snake,a rattler.If it frightened me I cant recall but it terrified my folks.In quick order the snake was dealt extreme prejudice.They killed it with a hoe.Maybe my fear of snakes was inherited from my parents.Momma’s sister Lema was bitten by a rattler and almost died.Once  Daddy took me hunting.We were leaning up against a tree.It was fall and the ground was covered with leaves.From a distance I seen something moving through the leaves.It was a snake,it’s tongue flickering heading straight for us.Daddy I see a snake.That’s all it took.He out ran me back to the car.And he was the one with a gun.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Momma I had a dream

Momma I had a dream. I want to call Momma thinking to myself. Dialing the phone, over and over I could not remember your number. Then I realized that you were no longer here.You had gone to a better place.A place with no tears or fears.Momma I wanted to talk to you so much but am so happy that your suffering has ended.

Harold Winford Haynes

A young Harold Winford Haynes,my Daddy.I guess this was taken when he was about 18 just before he was drafted into the army during WW2.He was living in Macon,Georgia at the time.How most of the family ended up in Macon someone who knows will have to tell me someday.Story is Daddy knew he was going to be drafted so he left Macon to stay with his sister Myrtle who lived in Roanoke,Alabama.His draft notice was there before he was.Least that is what he told me.

Something

What can I write about today?Something that is important.Something that will help mankind.Something that will feed the hungry,clothed the naked,heal the sick.Something that will bring joy and peace to this fast spinning rock in space we call Earth.Something that will give hope to those who feel hopeless.Something that will for a brief moment will make you laugh forgetting all your woes.Something that will give you peace in your life.Something that will make us all hug each other loving sincerely.At the moment I have no answer but will give this idea much thought.It will be something to do.

3rd Sunday in May

This photo from the 1960’s was taken at Uncle Bill’s after Memorial Day at Bethel East Baptist church in Randolph County Alabama. It’s called 3^rd Sunday in May by some. Grandma Smith is the tall woman in the center. From left to right are the oldest to youngest of her kids.Walter,Bill,Arnold,Joe,Lema,Pauline,Ada(my Momma)Eugene and Bobby.There were 13 kids in all,twin boys died at birth,Flora Bell died at 5 and Lois died at 18.Grandpa Smith was the preacher at the old Bethel East church.Momma said they went to church in a wagon.They put her behind the pulpit as Grandpa preached giving her a sack of biscuits to keep her quite.She was only 5 when Grandpa died.Bill was the preacher later on at the new Bethel East.The church has a cemetery where most of Momma’s people are buried.Grandma never remarried after Grandpa died raising the kids herself.

Sally Lugene Brewster Haynes

A young Sally Lugene Brewster Haynes on the right.My Grandma.Who the other Lady is I have no idea.I know nothing of the Brewster side of my family.I hope I’m telling the story correct here,once Daddy,Momma and me went somewhere in Alabama to visit some of Daddy’s kin.A ferry was used to cross the river.It was like a raft that held one vehicle at a time pulled across the river by ropes or cables.What the people there where named I cant remember but it was Daddy’s uncle we visted.His name was Tom.Spending the night the hoot owls terrified me.Talk about country this was it.They all carried guns even the ladies had pistol and holster on when they were out side.Being a small boy this fascinated me.This is amazing to me but when I was 14 Daddy and me went to a family member’s funeral up in the same part of Alabama.It was Grandma’s Stepdad.I had never heard of him before that day.Daddy called him Grandpa Dunn and he lived to be a 100.Some older Lady at the funeral walked up to Daddy saying she had not seen him since he was a baby but recognized him.You were always the handsomest thing she told him and with a glare looked at me and said you don’t look anything like him.Maybe it was because all the Haynes’s had dark skin and hair with brown eyes.Story is that Grandma was Cherokee Indian,this I cant prove but it’s the story.I guess with my blue eyes light completion and hair I did stick out amongst them.Grandma always lived with us.Grandpa Haynes died when I was 3 years old.I was 10 when Grandma Haynes died.

Desperado

April of 2011 I moved from my home of 33 years in LaGrange, Georgia to a bordering state.

The grass had grown at the old home place. Neighbors complained to LaGrange city code enforcement .

I got a call from an officer named Rick explaining the problem. I told him it would be taken care of and it was.Another phone call and another. They were finding all sorts of problems.

 Officer Rick said his boss was pushing the matter.He said a warrant for my arrest was possible but I was out of state and his jurisdiction.

I had visions of the LPD,TSO,GSP,GBI,FBI,DEA,DOD,CIA and all of those other 3 letter agencies hiding behind the Welcome to Georgia sign just waiting for my arrival back to my home state.Black unmarked helicopters in the sky hovering above the stateline,swat teams camouflaged in the bushes, satellites beaming back
info on my where abouts,the Coast Guard out in force in case I tried to enter Georgia by boat down the river.

It took me 59 years to become a desperado, 59 years of obeying the law,being a good citizen and tax payer.

 Then the dreaded C word was brought up.COMDEEMING.

By this time I was worried.

Of all the things going on in my life this was something not needed.I was thinking of selling the house.But right now I could not afford the repairs needed.So thinking it over I did this.Calling my uncle I asked if he would be interested in the house.I wasn’t going to sell him the house but give it to him.He agreed. So I handed over the deed to my uncle and he started having work done to the house at once.

Everyone was now happy, neighbors and most important the city of LaGrange.My uncle was getting offers to buy the house and people wanting to rent it.

Then Officer Rick’s boss stopped by and did everything but cuss my uncle out telling him how hard he was going to make things for him.Even Officer Rick was shocked and said his boss was out of line.

Work continued and now get this!

After a day of painting my uncle arrived at the house and found the electrical service from the pole to the house had been cut.

Calling the city he was told that this was the first step in condemning a house.Shocked he started making phone calls.He was getting the run around.Then he talked to some lady with the city and she explained it was a mistake,seems they had got the address mixed up! The city would be right out to reconnect the electrical wires she said.

Now are you sitting down!

 A sign placed by the city of LaGrange, a large sign, saying that they where taking action to condemn the house was placed in the front yard.

Another call to the city of LaGrange.

Guess what ?

No one knew anything about it! My uncle and I received summons to appear in court. The offers he had gotten to buy the house disappeared. So he did the best thing he took an offer from a guy to buy the house just to cover his cost outlay. So that ended the fiasco on ……. Street.

 It was gone from our lives.

 Now get this.

 I was talking to my uncle recently. Seems my aunt who has a house she doesn’t live in had a visitor.Her grandson was cutting the grass and noticed the front door open.Guess who had invited his self in?It was our old friend from the city of LaGrange, Officer Rick’s boss.

 He wanted permission to enter the house! Why ask he was already in the house.

So this ex resident of LaGrange,Georgia is thinking that maybe,just maybe things with the city of LaGrange are not like they should be.I was born in the old City County Hospital.My parents are buried at Shadowlawn Cemetery.Most of my family still live in LaGrange.No matter where I live LaGrange will be home if only in my heart.I have been told you can’t fight city hall.

But I still can voice my opinion on how it’s being operated.

WE DO WEE

Recently I spent a night in Wedowee,Alabama.WE DO WEE some call it.Wedowee is a small nice place.It was a warm April day.In the car I started feeling a bit sick.That was putting it mildly.My eyes went blurry,head felt like it was in a vise,cold clammy sweat,and my left arm and neck where hurting,then nausea.I didn’t say anything till we got to the house.Fact I never made it inside.The ambulance was called.Wedowee was where the hospital was.The guy taking x rays of my chest asked if I had ever been there before and I answered that I didn’t even know Wedowee had a hospital. All they could find was my blood pressure was low, white blood cell count was low and I had some type of infection.So I was admitted to the hospital. At 5am time for more blood test.I was awake and hungry .7am breakfast arrived.Biscuit,scrambled eggs,a strip of real bacon,grits and coffee and OJ.Noon came around and so did lunch.You would not believe it but it was cornbread,turnip greens,mac and cheese,a slice of ham,iced sweet tea and vanilla ice cream for desert.While eating the Doctor stuck his head in the door seen I was busy and said he would be back in a few.Lunch was great. Doctor was in asking all the routine questions.A nurse came in and more ekg’s were done.Seems they found my heartbeat not normal but I already knew that there was a little problem with my ticker.Ok you can go home if you feel like it he said.I was ready.There is one thing.I was looking forward to supper.After a great breakfast and lunch I could only imagine what supper would have been.So there you have it my night in Wedowee or as some call it WE DO WEE.

Us three

This is the only photo of Momma,Daddy and me I have of us together.It was Christmas 1961.I was 9.

Pretty girls

Pretty girls out for a stroll.Momma is on the right side of the photo.Just guessing,they must have been  teens.Her sister Pauline is the second from left.Story goes about way Momma got her name is Grandpa was at the store and Ada Noles who ran the store asked what the new baby was named.Just kidding he said Ada.Well Ada Noles started gathering up things for the baby.After all that they could not change her name.Years after Ada Noles would buy Momma dolls,clothes and other things for Christmas and birthdays.

Thinking of Grandpa

This is a photo of Lee Anderson Haynes.My Grandpa,pictured with 2 of his coon dogs at his home in Alabama.I was 3 when he died but memories of him are  cemented in my brain.He was tall,slim,white headed always wearing long sleeve white shirts and brogan type shoes.He liked peaches and cream,talking and laughing,hunting with his dogs.Never met a stranger someone said of him.My memory starts at his farm in Roanoke,Alabama.My job was to gather the eggs every morning and help slop the hogs in the evening.After all these years I still miss him,love him.If I make it to the other side hope he is one of the first I meet.

Georgia on my mind

Georgia is my home.

 Georgia is in my heart.

Born there,raised there it’s home.

Every time I hear Ray Charles’s version of Georgia on my mind it tugs a bit at my heart.

When I die maybe if my wishes are carried out I will be cremated and scattered around a few of my favorite places in Georgia.

Some over on the coast of Georgia where the Atlantic Ocean is.

Up in the mountains on a beautiful fall day when the leaves are busting with color an ash or two.

A bit under a grove of tall green Pine trees where I can hear the singing of wind blowing through them on a warm summers day.

Sprinkle some over Atlanta because I always liked the big town.

East Newnan leave a few also.Lots of memories there.

Down around LaGrange where home was for so long.

What ashes that are left take to the top of Stone Mountain leave a bit there so I will have a good view of the eastern sky where I will be waiting for the return of Jesus.

Happy Birthday

December 27th 1925.Happy Birthday Daddy you will be 85 years old.It sure has been a long time Daddy I love and miss you.

Back from the dead

Back from the land of the dead.

Let me fill you in.Monday afternoon my life was saved.You Dear friend know who you are and I thank you from the deepest part of my heart.

Some background info.

For five days I could not stand the thought of food.I only wanted fluids.Ice water,Gatorade and 7 up.I was throwing up everything even some stuff that wasn't supposed to be there.Talking blood here folks .Felt like a bear had me in a death grip squeezing the life out of me.I was gasping for air.I had to go,go the ER.
Ambulance was called and in a few minutes with siren blasting they drove up.In the ambulance for the short ride to the ER.No pulse,can't find a heart rate the EMT in back with me told the driver.In the ER straight back no waiting and they started working on me.IV's,sticking me with needles,covering me with warm blankets cause my body temp was dropping.Oh those warm blankets where so nice.


Diabetic ketoacidosis was what the diagnose was.



Up to ICU for two days,then a regular room for two more days.Home now and really I feel good,just a bit weak.My friend said I was ready to checkout.I wasn't scared just disappointed.Saturday night before I was crying to myself,this is not fair,heal me or let me go.I was that sick.With all my other problems this wasn't needed.Like everything this to has a reason.I appreciate my Dear friend so much now.I will not be so hardheaded and learn from this.So my friend's,that is how my week is going.Feeling good on the mend and happy for another chance at life.

Queasy

Gee I have always hated this feeling.Queasy,like you are gonna throw up.I think it was the coffee on an empty stomach.Or maybe the virus or flu is still with me.I felt good when I got up but now,sheesh.I feel woozy and have a head ache also.I want to try staying up.Almost three days in bed and that gets old.Oh well will wait and see how this turns out.

Conbread

Cold buttermilk and warm cornbread.Man on man talk about good.Momma would bake cornbread,I still have the old black cast iron skillet,I would cut a slice of cornbread and smother it with mayonnaise.That was a treat and so good.Butter beans, peas,collards any type of vegetable goes good with cornbread.Just take a slice with a onion and that is good.Cornbread and potato salad.Does it get any better?Cornbread not that sweet stuff is a staple for us Southerners.At dinner that is lunch for some a big pan of cornbread would be baked.What was left over would be your supper.Sweet milk or buttermilk and cornbread.First class eating.

Buttermilk

Hi everyone.I have not been on the computer since Wednesday.I had some type of flu or virus or something.Went to bed Wednesday night and stayed there till this morning.Was not hungry at all so two days with out food or drink.I just could not think of food.Queasy I was.I am much better now I am hungry.I want or crave a taco pizza and Oreo cookies.I would love some buttermilk to dunk the cookies in but will settle for coffee.So that is the story from this end.

Do the right thing

Gee.How can people be so cruel to others.War,murder,abuse,on and on.What makes people want to hurt.Hurt someone and live with them self.We are supposed to be master of all domain,over animals but I think humans are the animals sometimes.Can animals murder?I don't know,guess it's possible.I know I am getting on one of those far fetched ideas.I have been dog bit and cat scratched but maybe that was my fault.I have been cruel to others with my words.I have remorse for it.Maybe that is what separates us from the animals.I have had this discussion with people.Would you kill to protect your family?I can't answer that till I'm faced with it.Maybe I would turn and run.Hope not.I like to think I could.I want to.Protect those I love.Could I be brave enough to help a stranger who was in dire need?A life or death situation?At times like that I am smart enough to say wait till faced with it.Just hope if ever in that kind of situation I could do the right thing.

Grocery store parking lots

People are amazing.I liked just sitting in grocery store parking lots waiting on Momma to do her shopping.All the different stories with a person to go along with it.A sniplet of life parking lots can be.I was shocked once.A woman was smoking a little cigar and walking hand hand with another woman.The guy who I could tell was homeless.Wearing all his clothes.Several shirts and pairs of pants asking me when the Liquor store open.She was always around.I never knew her real name but most here in LaGrange know who I am talking about.She pushed her son around in a shopping cart.I never knew the whole story maybe I don't want to know.Buddy can you give me a quarter was what she always asked.Wonder what happened to them?Then there was the interracial couple pushing a baby carriage.From my seat I could see black couples,white couples turn and stare at them.Yep a grocery store parking lot is like a window of the world.You can learn a lot.

Oz

Wizard of Oz.I don't like that movie.Well not so much the movie but one song in it.Somewhere over the rainbow.Here is the story.There was a place here when I was a kid called Hanson's drive in.It was a Sunday evening and that is where Me and my folks where.Momma said when we get home we where going to watch The Wizard of Oz.I knew nothing of the movie.I was 6 years old.Sure enough we watched it.Now why I don't like that song.Everytime I hear it it brings tears to my eyes.I always remember Momma and Daddy and eating hamburgers at Hanson's drive in.Some say that it should be a good memory.Maybe it was but it makes me cry to myself.

Old is now new

Today would be a good time to just sit around the roaring fireplace.Feet propped up and a large hot cocoa in your hands.This house has a fireplace and old chimney still stands.Only thing is it has been covered up with paneling.All the mill houses had fireplaces cause they where built in the 1920's.This is how I figure it.Back years ago when the city started offering natural gas to people I guess it was more popular than keeping the fireplace.So when homes where remodeled the fireplace was covered up.Now a fireplace in all new homes is a must.It is the style.Just like hardwood floors.Use to be carpet in every room now everyone wants hardwood floors.I guess it is true.What ever is old is now new and everyone wants it.

Shadows on the wall

Glimpse of my past maybe.I see shadows on the wall.The fireplace is crackling and the smell of burning wood fills my senses.Staring at the glowing fire I am in deep thought.Trance like I stare.I catch myself doing that.What is it .Is it really a glimpse from my past or am I just daydreaming.It is like being hypnotized by the flickering lights on the wall.It does not scare me.Wish it could be taken further.See what it's all about.Maybe my past or maybe something else.I just want to know.

Old red truck

One of these days I am going to write about Daddy's old truck.I have pictures and will add them to the story.1984 Ford F150 it was called an Explorer back then.Red with a silver top.Georgia Bulldog colors.Silver stripe down the side.It was the only new vehicle he ever bought.His retirement truck he called it.He had this thing about money.He liked spending it and Momma didn't.Many a time he would tell me no need for your Momma to know how much this cost.Best I can remember she did not say anything about his new truck.Maybe she was lost for words.When he died in 1991 the truck only had 27,000 miles on it.He only drove it to work.Maybe to Macon a few times or the big farmers market in Atlanta.The first time it was washed I did it.Leave it with me Daddy I will wash it.He fell for it I just wanted to drive around a bit in his new truck.I did wash it.I was in the bed of the truck and it was all soapy and wet and whoops down I went.Fell hard.This is true.Every time I drove the truck to Alabama something would happen to it.Once it caught on fire with me.Leaves down in the cowl of the truck burst into flames.Made it home but it would not crank so had it pulled in.Water pump went out on one trip.Transmission on another trip.I wrecked the truck twice.First time it was totaled by insurance company.I told them I wanted the truck fixed and they did.Gosh I had it painted solid red and talk about pretty that old truck turned heads.More than once a pretty woman would come up to me and say nice truck !After the second wreck which by the way where not my fault the old truck never did drive quite right but that was ok.It was Daddy's and that was all that mattered.Like I said there is a picture here of it and soon maybe I will add it to this story.Oh I almost forgot the moral of the story.What ever happened to me when driving tho old truck it always got me home.Kinda like Daddy and the old truck where watching out for me.That is what I like to think anyway.

Remember?

Most likely today in history is forgotten.I asked a younger person if they know what December 7th was.Their answer was it's Tuesday.Well guess they where right it is Tuesday.Seems that day that will live in infamy did not.1941 about 7am,Hawaii,Pearl Harbor.Now do you remember?

It is sad

I have no earth shattering news today.A cold day but sun is out.Least there is no snow like some are having.I know,in my old age I'm a fuddle duddle.Don't care for the snow,glad when the Holidays will be over.Yea ! Things back to normal what ever normal is.Snow is like life.It's pretty at first then it melts and is an ugly mess.Piled up on the side of the road mixed with dirt and trash.That is the way alot of us sorry to say will end up.Not piled up on the roadside but put away.Put up out of view,out of sight out of mind sorta.Things are not like they use to be.Families took care of each other.Now if you can't keep up off to the nursing home they send you.It is the best thing for ole so and so,they will be better off ole so and so will.Right.Fool yourself.Say it long enough and you will convince yourself that the right thing was done.A throw away person.Thrown away like a newspaper that is ragged and used up.Like a old pair of shoes.It is sad.

Give them strength

It always frightens me.Always has.I am talking about sirens.Ambulance just went down the street and it means trouble for someone.A man said once that he hated to see the hearse stop at his neighbor's house but glad it didn't stop at his.I could not pronounce siren for the longest,it always came out as sardine.If one of my folks was out away from me and I heard a siren I would almost panic.I just knew it was coming for them.Still when I hear one I automatically pray for who ever it is going for and I pray for their family to give them strength to face whatever comes there way.

All we had was our imagination

I spent Sunday in bed.Nope wasn't sick.Was not mad at anyone.I just had no dire need or reason to do otherwise..I watched some old movies on TV.Some I liked.It was just a day to lay in bed and think.Oh shoot I forgot to think.I sometimes think to much.Keeps me up at nights it does.Thinking about this and that.I know sometimes it's hard to switch off the brain and relax and sleep. My old body can be so tired.To tired to move but the brain won't cooperate and just keeps spinning.Wide awake staring at the ceiling.I can look out my bedroom window and see trees and the sky.With out much trouble I can make out designs,people or things in the tree branches.Same way with clouds.I guess everyone does this.I guess this was the way cavemen entertained them selfs when not hunting or being hunted.I think that is one thing kids of today are missing out on.Imagination.They have computers,cell phones,I pods etc to keep them busy.All we had was our imagination.

I know nothing

I know one thing.I was smarter as a kid than now.I could pick up a leaf and tell you what type of tree it fell off.Take a rock any rock and tell you it's name and history.Same way with birds.Knew all their names.What happened I don't know.Now I know nothing.

Santa knows

When I was a kid living on Juniper Street there was a store called Browns.It was just a neighborhood store.The old CoCola ice box had the coldest Cokes.Always ice in them.The store is still there but I think ownership has changed hands a few times since I was a kid.Walk into the big brick building.On the right hand side.On top of the meat counter.There it was.A Christmas present to die for.In a box,clear front.It was a rife.No not a real rifle but a plastic play army gun.Every time I was in the store I would stop and look.Wow that would be great if Santa brought that I thought.Now this is what I haven't figured out after all these years.How did Santa know I stopped and drooled over that toy.Well I must have been a good little boy that year cause that is what Santa brought me.

No white Christmas

I have never seen a white Christmas.Been close a few times.Have been through cold Christmas morns.But no snow.Why does anyone want a white Christmas any way?If I was a kid warm sunny weather would be ideal for being outside with your toys.Each his own as they say.Maybe this is not right.Memory maybe is getting cloudy.But it does seem like in past years the weather was colder.Don't get me wrong it is cold right now .My fingers are freezing.We had gas space heaters as a kid.We also used coal for the fireplace up in the country.Never did the heaters stay on at night.Those first few steps on an icy cold floor sure got my attention.No carpet back then.Just a bare wood floor most likely painted brown.Or sometimes those linoleum floor coverings.No white Christmases in my past but some cold ones.Maybe there is something to that global warming.Sure could use a little of it now.

Space race

I read where a Russian rocket caring some satellites exploded or crashed in the pacific ocean near Hawaii.GPS satellites I think they where.The article mentioned something about a space race and that got my attention.I am old enough to remember the first space race between Russia and America.Sputnik the Russian satellite caused a big up roar.That tiny little thing way up in the sky sending out it's little beeps sure shook the United States up.I.There are two great movies about all this.One is called October Sky that has the Sputnik story in it.And another is The Right Stuff.Seems rockets,satellite and moon trips aren't as popular as they once where.Watching rockets blast off use to make the news.Now it is just so so news.I don't know which one of the rocket launches it was I can't remember.It was one of the original astronauts.At Southwest Elementary school they marched us all into the auditorium.Sat us down .On stage was a tiny b&w TV.We watched as the space launch took place.Back in those day in was big news and we all took notice.I remember where I was when man landed on the moon for the first time.On the 3rd shift,age 17,July working in the mill.It was exciting and something to be proud of.Sometimes I think that is what our Country needs now.Something everyone can agree on and support.We need another space race.

Son of lint heads

I have lived the majority of my life on what is called a Mill Village.

Always near by me I could lay in bed on summer nights with windows up and hear the clinky clank of the mill.My Momma and Daddy always worked in the mills.

Cotton mills,carpet mills,etc.

Textiles.

Seen them come home from work covered with cotton lint.Hence the word Lint Head.

A word just as derogatory as the N word.

Some took it on them self to look down on us hard working people.Maybe I should have said those hard working people.I never have worked a hard day in my life like Momma and Daddy had to.I was always lucky when it came to jobs.

We lived on the village.In a mill house.You know what the house I live in now is a mill house.It was built in 1925.Sold in the 40's after the war I think.I have been here 32 years this month.

Never was I ashamed to live what some call the wrong side of town.I didn't see it that way.I do know of some who deny living on the village in their youth.Why do that it is nothing to be ashamed of.

We well our parents kept us feed and clothed.They kept the other businesses in town operating by buying their products.At one time mills where the only place for people to work here in LaGrange.

People came from the farms in the country to have jobs.In the 1920's there was a strike here.Some wanted an union.Naturally the mill owners did not want it.I think the National Guard or some private police force was used to quench the strikers.The mill owners fired and turned out some out of their houses who where striking.

The owners did do alot for the workers.

To be fair.

They built schools,libraries,recreation facilities for the workers and their families.Day before I turned 16 I started working in the mill.So all said I guess the mills and mill village will always be a big part of my life and memories.

I think if Momma and Daddy had not moved around so much and stayed at the old Callaway mills they both would have had 50 years each at those mills.The mill a few blocks from the house has just about closed down if it hasn't already. Hillside Plant and at one time was the largest plant in LaGrange.

The village where I live is called Hillside.Yep it is hilly over here.So I am a son of lint heads.It really don't bother me.I know what and who I am.And I am very proud of my folks for working so hard.

They are heroes in my eyes.

I enjoyed that

I have a friend who said his Daddy swears that back in the 1950's he had a beer with Hank Williams at some road side beer joint.That is very possible.My brush with famous people has been very limited.I know a woman said she was stopped at a stoplight in Springfield,Ohio and who do you guess drove up next to her and asked for directions?It was Steven King the writer.Momma seen the train that had FDR's body when it traveled from the Little White House at Warm Springs.Ok this is my brush with famous people.Back in the 60's we where at the watermellon festival in Forest Park,Georgia.The high light of the day was Porter Wagnoer with Speck Green and some unknown woman named Dolly Parton.I did see Jimmy Carter and Rosalyn when he was Governor of the Great State of Georgia.It was at a NASCAR race at what was called Atlanta International Raceway back then.They flew in on a little helicopter piloted by a Georgia State Trouper.This I got a kick out of.One Of the Carter sons tried getting on the helicopter as it was leaving.Just the pilot on board.No matter what that pilot was determined to keep that Carter boy off.The Carter boy fussed and pitched a fit but the pilot flew off without him.You know what I enjoyed that.

Eat a green thing

What for breakfast.I have can peanuts here at computer.I have chocolate chip cookies also.I was thinking laying in bed some nachos would be good.That was my plan.Yesterday this was what I ate.Two tacos,one Mexican pizza and for supper some chili from Wendys.I know junk huh.Today would be a good day for some collards and cornbread and instant mashed potatoes.Instant mashed potatoes are better than homemade plus a whole lot easier and quicker but that is just my thinking.There was a gallon jar of homemade pepper sauce here somewhere.Neighbor gave it to us about 5 years ago.Never been opened.Yikes that stuff might have turned into rocket fuel by now.Bet it has a punch but sure would be good on the collards or turnip greens.My Grandma Smith ate collards.Ended up in the hospital.She was about dead.Doctor told her not to eat that stuff.Feed it to cows not humans he said.He was doctor smart but not country smart.Greens are good for you and taste wonderful.Heard a comedian on TV say his Mom told him to eat a green thing every day.So Think I will take her advice and eat a green thing.

Thank you Susie !

We got cats.We got kittens.Plan was to adopt them out.Well one was.The rest are still here.They just might stay cause I have become attached.Last night it was real late or real early I don't know.My left arm hurts sometimes and it did last night.It woke me up.The pain was bad.From my shoulder down to my fingers it ached.My fingers where numb.Tossing and turning I thought maybe I should wake someone up.I held out it was way to early.This is what happened.The smallest kitten,a black calico who I call Susie got into bed with me.She went under the covers and was laying on my hurting arm.She was so warm and just a purring.You know what?I think that little kitten knew what pain I was having and decided to help.And she did.My pain did go away.Susie little kitten I thank you so much !

Things all southern

Things all Southern.There are many.Grits with butter,swimming in butter with salt and black pepper.Strik-o-lean,delightful.If you don't know what it is it's salty strips of meat,looks like bacon but is what is called fatback,just in strips.Take strik-o-lean,gravy,mustard and cut up onions and you have a meal fit for any country boy.Dip your biscuit in the gravy mustard and onion mix and yum yum.Might be best to soak the meat overnight because it is so salty.CoCola.CoCola it's called not pop or soda.CoCola covers all soft drinks from a to z.Some one may offer you a CoCola but don't be surprised if it's not a coke.Krystals and Crispy Creme doughnuts.If the South had those two items back then I think the Civil War would have ended different.Kudzu.Now that has been called the South's secret weapon but I think it was imported from Japan just for one reason.Stopping soil from being washed away,yep I know there is a word for but I tried spelling it and spellcheck was no help.Red Georgia clay.It will ruin your bluejeans quicker than your Momma can slap you.Officer Don and the Popeye club that crame on in the 50's and 60's from WSB TV.Stone Mountain now that is one big rock.Double Cola.A strong soft drink.Peachtree Street.Every Georgia town has at least one some more and yes it can be confusing.Peanuts in your coke.Shoot there are more many more but my brain and fingers are tired.Till next time !

Simple as they get

I think well I know that dysfunctional fits me to a T.Always,my entire life I felt like something was out of wack.Never fitting in.Never like others.But maybe that not all that bad.Some I'm glad we have nothing in common.How many people in the world are there?God made us all different.That I am happy for.All those billions of people and everyone different with their on way of doing things.Their own opinions.It sure would be boring if everyone was alike.Like what Henry Ford said you could get his cars in any color you wanted long as it was black.What that meant I have no idea.Maybe it was a metaphor.A big word huh.I know people who can say those reader digest words,those 50 cent ones.Who are they trying to impress?Me or themselves.I walked into the lab at the water plant one day.Just me and the first shift operator.Just to make conversation I asked if that was his brief case.The proper word is attache case he said.Ok I said to my self but brief case would have served the purpose as well.No big fancy word was needed.I stutter sometimes.Know some words I can't pronounce correct.I have been know to even get tongue tied so I keep my words simple.Some folks put on airs I think.I hope never anyone thinks that about me.I am as simple as they get.

Just put me in the freezer

Cold this morning.Temp was 27 degrees when I woke up.I am glad that seasons change here.Must be boring having one type of weather year round.Here in Georgia we get all four seasons.Fall is the most beautiful.Never met anyone who doesn't like fall.I know this sounds like the Chamber of Commence brochure but Georgia is a great place to live.Mountains to the north.Atlantic ocean to the east.Flat farm land down in south Georgia.I am a Georgia native.Born here raised here.Even got a grave spot here in LaGrange that is ready for me when I am ready so to speak.I have convinced myself that burial in the ground is not for me.Cremation is the way to go.I know some folks who have chose that route.I just don't like the idea of a six foot hole in the ground,in a metal box,inside a concrete vault.I have been by the graveyard and seen graves just dug filled with water.I know when a body is placed in a grave they take all the care in the world to protect it but it is useless.You will melt away so to speak.So cremation will get the job done quicker.Back to ashes from which we came.Plus it is a lot cheaper.Basic funerals are up in the $1000's of dollar range.I read recently cremation starts at round $1000 or less.I don't want a funeral.Funerals are one of the most stressful situations you can put a family through.Funerals are for the living anyway so I will save people money and stress and bow out easy and quiet.No big deal.Just say yep he is dead,that all she wrote,get it over with .I have one request.Wait till the fourth day after I have died before you cremate me ok.Someone told me that your soul hangs around for that long after you die.Something I don't understand.A golden cord,keeping the body and soul togather.So take no chances wait those four days.Plus this is another reason for no funeral.I never have seen a good looking corpse.I hear people say don't he look good.Don't they look peaceful.They are dead and where sick most likely before they died.Unless the mortician is a wizard they ain't going to look good.Plus I don't want no one looking down at me in that casket and saying that.So when my time comes there will be no funeral,no wake,no sitting up with the dead,none of that stressful stuff.Just put me in the freezer,wait four days and then cremate me.That is how it is and how I want it.

No winner

Have you ever been slapped without a hand being layed on you?I have.Believe me it hurts just as bad .Words or looks hurt.I am trying to make a compassionate effort to put myself into others people shoes .Their feelings.Think before I say something that might be took the wrong way.My joking is often took the wrong way.Got to stop that.The second something leaves my mouth often I have thought that did not come out right.I didn't mean it that way.I be Hatti never would I hurt anyone.I mean their feelings.My actions are not always good.Ok it is a fault I have.I won't pick no more.I don't need a fight.No more.I never win.No one wins.

The Captain,Mr Green Jeans,Bunny Rabbit and me

Saturday mornings.About 6am.In my PJ'S.A bowl of cornflakes and sweet milk.Sitting on the floor in front of the black and white TV.Just me.No one is up.Watching the Indian test pattern waiting for another day of excellent broadcasting to start.So it was as a kid.TV was so important then.Any given day I could ramble off the programs and time they came on.In my innocence I remember wondering if the cowboys on those Saturday morning programs ever had to take a bathroom break.Dancing in front of the TV I didn't know that it was a one way mirror and they could not see me like I could them.Captain Kangaroo,Mr Green Jeans,Bunny Rabbit and Moose.I never could make anything the Captain did with a shoe box and scissors like he did.

Life worth living

I wish that love could be bottled up and dished out when ever you need it.Everyone needs it.Deny all you want but we do.There have been times in my life where even JohnLee has needed love.Someone who really cares.Someone who is our best friend.Lucky are those that find it and keep it.Have you ever noticed a puppy or other small animal who has never been hugged,loved and how they turn out in life?They become suspicious of everyone,they don't trust.They seem so unhappy.Humans turn out the same way I think.So I rank love right up there with food and shelter for us to survive.Oh you can live without but it makes life worth living.

The Dell guy

I could live without it but never would I want to.Computers and the Internet.That is what the subject is.2000 I think was the year I got a puter.Heck I ordered it from the Dell guy on TV.Thank goodness there was a color coded chart showing you how to hook it all up.I am a man and men don't read the instructions.Least I don't.It went togather good,no problems and there it was may computer,sitting on my desk that I have had since I was 10 years old.So that makes the desk 48 years old now.I am getting off track now but that is the way my brain works.I have a few things left from my childhood.I still have my old shotgun,20 gauge Stevens.I have the old desk.Story behind it is my Daddy had a tool box built for him and the man who built it had material left over so he built me a desk.Ok so it is small and my big feet won't fit under it anymore but I like it contrare to what others might think of it.What else do I have?A Levi blue jean jacket I bought in Newnan,Georgia at age 16 when I first started working.I can get it on but no way will it button up on me.I think it shrunk don't you?No.I got fat.O k what was my subject?What was I talking about?Oh yeah computers.I still only know how to turn them on.Click on an icon and off I go on the WWW.My window on the world computers are.I can look up anything.I can and have made friends on the computer.I think really computers are a God sent instrument.They can be used for so much good.Granted there are some bad awful stuff on them but even without computers that evil would still be lurking in man's mind.Good or bad,computers,I am so thankful I took a chance and called the Dell guy and got one.

Rubbing dirt on my clothes

The only pill I take is a low dose aspirin.Most of the time I forget it.The bottle is sitting on the computer so I can be reminded to take it.Let me count.I am suppose to be taking 3 more pills each day but I just gave them up.One for my diabetes ,one for blood pressure and another for cholesterol.Oh I do take over the counter pills for pain every once in a while.Never in my life was I a pill taker.Never was I one to go to the doctor either.When I was a little boy if my Daddy told me to keep my clothes clean we had some where to go after getting home from school I took that to mean you are going to the doctor and that means shots and that means pain.I think going to the doctor was one of my worst fears.Honest it still is.I always afraid they will find something and me personally if I got something that is going to kill me I would rather not know.Just let in slip up on me I say.The doctor sent me to the heart clinic here for what do you call it...a sonogram or something like that.Anyway it is the ultra sound thing they do with your heart.I got a call that an appointment to see a cardiologist had been made for me.Heck I did not go.I do know that my ticker beats way to fast but what ever else is wrong if I don't know about it I won't worry right?Now back to when I was a little boy.Like I said if I thought I was going to be taken to the doctor and I do mean taken no way would I go easy I would run under the house.hide and rub dirt all over my clean clothes.Sometimes that worked other times well.People in my family die of two things.Cancer or heart attacks.Neither is pleasant.So these days I am just letting nature take it's course.I think that our lives have been planned out from second one of our life.What will happen will.Why fight it.Don't get me wrong,like my Daddy said when he was on his death bed everyone wants to live as long as they can.I sure do.I just don't want to suffer a long painful death.Make mine quick please,no time for me to suffer or be scared if all possible.Oh well it is something we all will face someday.I don't even know how I got on this subject.Gee hope I haven't depressed you to much.Ok enough of this thinking.Let's have another cup of coffee.

Ding ding

Good morning everyone.I'm in a mood today.Sheesh.Ever have one of those days when you first open your eyes you just know today will be....I will let you fill in the blanks.I can just pick up on others feelings without a word being said.That is not good most of the time.Some days I just want to stay in bed or least till I can't stand it anymore.Get me one of those little brass bells and go ding ding when I need something.Ding ding bring coffee.Ding ding bring breakfast with grits,hash browns,bacon,biscuits and ding ding keep the coffee coming.Yeah in my dreams huh.But it was a thought anyway.

My name was Johnny

It is getting late here.Sun is setting on whats been a pretty good day.Bit cold to me.Yesterday was warm in the 70's.Sure was glad someone turned the heat on when they got up this morning.Ok this is what is on my mind.My name is John.But forever people who knew me when I was a kid called me Johnny.But that was the name I used for the first part of my life.Even my social security card is signed Johnny.But now I am just John.I am old,sorta mature,well sometimes I am.But to all my friends and family who knew me from way back then you don't have to call me John,Johnny will work just fine.

The cowboys

I was and still am a fan of Cowboys.Movie cowboys.TV cowboys.The Lone Ranger who was sponsored by Colonial bread on TV where I lived.Sugar Foot.The Virginian.Gunsmoke.Never did out draw Matt on those Saturday Nights.Hop Along Cassidy,Gene Autry,Roy Rogers the list could go on.I seen where True Grit has been remade with Jeff Bridges playing John Wayne's part.I would like to see that movie.310 to Yuma the old version and the newer one where excellent.There are so many good cowboy movies and TV programs no room here to mention them all.See the picture above?That is The Cisco Kid.Setting up the story here so bear with me.The Central Georgia State fair is held or was at that time in Macon.Luck be it while visting my Daddy's sisters we always went to the fair.The Cisco Kid was to be there.Oh boy I was excited.I waited and waited but Cisco never showed up.A devastated kid I was.But I got over it and no hard feelings are held against him.But as Pancho said at the end of each program.Ohhhhh Cisco!

The swinging bridge and fat man's squeeze

Vacation at Rock City.I was a boy,just a kid my folks and the Calwells and their kids went to Chattanooga,Tennessee.Riding around the mountain was scary for me.Glad my Daddy was driving.One little slip over the edge you go.Off to Lookout Mountain we went.Rock City.You can travel the country side in the South and see painted on peoples barns See Rock City.Still to this very day you can see it.There was the swinging bridge.Momma forgive me and bless your soul she crawled across the swinging bridge.She was terrified.It was a swinging,high above the tree tops.Even after I had grown up I teased her about that swinging bridge.Now,.there was a cave.It had what was called fat man's squeeze.Me in my young thinking just knew Daddy would not make it through fat man's squeeze.Much to my relief he did.Fat man's squeeze by the way was an opening between 2 walls of the cave.There was Ruby Falls,another cave.But what got my attention was the bears.They had bears and never had I seen real live bears.I remember seeing the Chattanooga Battlefield being a civil war history buff even at that young age it was sacred and amazing ground for me.So this a quick roundup of my trip to Rock City.See seven states form Lookout Mountain they say.

Don't mess with country folk

It was a scene out of the old west.

Daddy was working for a mobile home place delivering and setting up mobile homes.This was in the 1970's.He was going to Sand Mountain,Alabama to pick up a mobile home at the factory.I went along for the ride.What a ride it was it that sawed off truck.It was like a regular 18 wheeler but shorter.

It was a long round trip but that is not the story.

We had barely got out of LaGrange,on US 27 just before Franklin,Georgia when on the right hand side of the road we seen for lack of a better word a posse.There where hundreds of people standing on side of the road facing the woods.

They had rifles,shotguns,pistols any type of weapon they could tote I guess.One lone Georgia State Patrol car was parked on the shoulder of the road.What is wrong?Daddy asked a man.Seems 2 desperadoes had robbed a store near by in Hogansville,Ga and they had been chased into the woods where everyone was waiting.

Waiting with their weapons ready for action.The Trouper was in the woods.Dogs where in the woods also.I never knew if the dogs where to track down the robbers for capture or to drive them out of the woods to face that angry mob of  all ages waiting with their guns.

I think it would have been smarter to surrender to the Trouper and dogs rather then face those people ready to enforce some Southern country justice.

Today is not the day

There are some things I won't write about.Just to personal for the world knowing.Only a very few people have heard my true story and that shall be the way it remains.Maybe someday I will put into words what I am thinking of.It is nothing dark and sinister.I have not murdered any of my wives and buried them under the house.Nothing like that.What I am thinking about was no great sin on my part.Nope I am not a spy for the CIA  Nothing that exciting.Knock on wood it's not about being in prison.I would never make it there.That has always been one of my fears.Prison.The big house.The poky.Slammer.What ever you want to call it has been a life long fear of mine.Oh and I have many fears.Another story for another time.Nope what I am thinking about is really not about any of those things.One of these days when subject matter is short,maybe I will write about what is on my mind.But today is not the day.

The world through a mirror

Watching my life pass me by.I do spend way to much time on this computer.No one has to tell me.Sitting here I can watch traffic go by the house.Watch what ever is going on outside from my little spot on planet Earth.I have a large mirror behind the computer desk and that is my window to the world.Granted everything will be reversed looking at the mirror.But you know,maybe that is not a bad way of looking at the world.

Chicken soup

Chicken soup.What is it about chicken soup.When ever I am feeling sick or down in the dumps,feeling blue or depressed I have found out that chicken soup will always make me feel better.I have heard it called Jewish penicillin and there just might be something to that thought.So if you are having one of those days where you need a little pick me up try chicken soup.Hope it works for you like it does for me.

Blustery day out

Well the tree beside my bedroom window is about bare.Not many leaves are left.I have a good view of the squirrel nest now.It is way up on top of the tree.The limb it's built on is swaying today.It's a blustery day here in LaGrange.Sky is  cloudy,a milky white color.Wind is really whipping around.It is to warm.70 degrees.Yesterday it was rainy and cold and I could not get warm.The weather is ripe for storms today.Crows woke me this morning.It's always a pleasure watching them play.Did not see the squirrels so I guess they are smart enough to know that bad weather could be on the way.Today my old bones are warm compared to yesterday so that is a good thing.

Till the Sun don't rise for me

Life is pretty good at times I think.Sure we all get tired and depressed.But for most of us it does not last.I would hate to go through life never finding anything funny.It sure can take away your problems when you laugh.Me and Momma could get laughing at something till the point of tears.I know of people who never find humor in anything.They are the ones with the long faces,pouting lips and that get away from me attitude.Gee it all my problems,all my shortcomings,all my faults I am so thankful that laughter has been and I hope a part of my life till the sun don't rise for me again.Without laughter life would be so boring.

Hole in my head

Maybe I have told this story,not sure.Living on Juniper Street,age about 8 most likely.My cousins and me made a tent from a bedspread.Why there was a broken pointed brick on top I have no idea.Making a long story short the brick fell and hit me right on top of my head.I bleed like a stuck pig as they say.It was on a Sunday.The day of 3rd Sunday in May or Decoration day up in the country at Bethel.That is homecoming and when people place flowers on the graves of their kin.It was about time for us to leave for the Church.Me my flat top hair,bleeding.No going to the emergency room for me.Momma got a handful of black soot from the fireplace and I guess stopped up the hole in my head.It worked.There I was sitting in church,black soot all over my flat top hair do.For years I had a black spot on my scalp.So for those that ask what is wrong with me,why I am so strange and weird,just blame it on that brick with the pointed end,the hole in my head and a handful of black soot.

In the end

I never have thought of myself as a bad person.I'm no saint but.What year was it let me think.2004 was the year.3am on some July morning.I had hit rock bottom emotionally I think.Momma had died the year before.I had 7 years of being her caretaker.She had Alzheimers and as time goes on the worse they become.I am going to say something .The only help ever I got was from my Aunt Lema and Uncle Eugene.What would I done without those two I don't know.She would be awake for days at a time and I had to stay up with her.But this is not the story.I got off track a bit.Sitting at the computer on that July morning at 3am I just let it all go.I started crying.I did not want to live like I was anymore.This is what happened.I asked for Jesus to forgive me of my sins.I had plenty.There was a peace that came over me.Hard to put into words.I have been saved.Some have questioned my sincerity about this lately.I have slipped plenty of times since that July morning.I never will be a saint.I am a human and make and will make more mistakes.Jesus died for my sins this I know as truth.In the end he will be all I have all I need.

Hoot owls a hooting

Daddy was from Clay County,Alabama.That was where he was born.Story is My Grandpa Haynes had his still in what is now called Talledega National Forrest.Yep that Talledega where the race track is.You Nascar fans know what I'm talking about.Anyway I remember going up there once.Their was Uncle Wiley my Grandpa's brother and Aunt Martha and Aunt Rosie.All Grandpa's sisters and brother..We had to cross a river on the way.I am guessing the Cosa river.No bridge you use a ferry.Not a ferry boat but a little raft looking thing just big enough for a car to fit on.There where cables or ropes I don't remember and it pulled you across from one side to the other.I remember getting stuck on a dirt road in the mud.No paved roads I guess.We stayed at one of Daddy's aunts.Talk about out in the sticks it was.She was out in the garden and was wearing a gun and holster  just like from the cowboy days.I could not sleep that night.I was a very young boy.I heard hoot owls a hooting all night and it terrified me.It was an experience never to be forgotten.Talk about country that was the country.

Sooner or later you will be found out

I have only stole one thing in my life.It was a little knife from a gum ball machine.It was in a fruit bowl on my Uncle's kitchen table.6 years old at the time,walking by the table I seen the little knife and took it.Daddy asked me where I got it.He had this thing of saying look me in the eyes and tell me when he knew I had been up to something.Well I did and the truth came out.I was so ashamed of my sin.I had to take the knife back to my uncle and apologize.That was really embarrassing.Every time I seen him come down our street I would run and hide under the house.You know that was a good life lesson for me.I found out at that early age that you can't hide anything.Sooner or later you will be found out.I never and I mean never stole anything again.I am the most honest person you will ever meet when it comes to others property.If it's not mine I wont touch it.

Resisting was no use

Gee it's a rainy cold day here in west central Georgia.The heat is on now and hope soon it warms the house up.My hands are cold.Maybe a pair of gloves from Santa would help.That reminds me of something.When I was in the 3rd grade I think we all walked to school.Southwest Elementary it was called then.School was several blocks away.One blustery rainy morning before leaving the house for my walk to school Momma made me wrap one of her scarfs around my head.Resisting was no use she made me wear it.Gosh I just knew someone would see me and say something.But I got lucky.Soon as I was out of her view that scarf came off.The day was saved.

Daddy I love you

This is not my favorite time of the year.

Christmas.

Always glad to see it get here.Always glad to see it go.

Daddy went to the hospital for the last time Christmas morning 1991.He had cancer and was...

December 27th was his 66th birthday and we spent it in the hospital with him.Staying night and day.Came New Years and we where still there.

Daddy was coming home.

With help from hospice we kept him home.Momma took care of the day time and I stayed up nights with Daddy.

Thursday January 9th one day after Momma's birthday early that night just me and him.I asked him if he was tired because he had been talking out of his head some.He had been working in the mill.Are you tired Daddy I asked?He just nodded his head yes.Daddy do what you need to do and don't worry about us.Again he nodded his head.I'm sorry he said.Daddy's last words to me.I told him he had nothing to be sorry about.I kissed his forehead and told him I love you.Again he just nodded his head.

After that he went into what I call a coma.About 10 am on January 9,1992 Daddy died.Daddy I miss you.Never thought I could make it without you but everything is okay.

I love you Daddy.

More understanding

It is almost funny .People including myself are quick to tell you what you did wrong.What you did bad.So on and so on.But ,I am guilty of this,never telling you what you do right.Why do we find it so easy to criticize but to praise your good qualities is near to impossible.Sometimes maybe this is so true we humans got a lot of things wrong and backwards.Maybe there is still time to grow and improve.That is what I want to do.Improve,grow and learn to be a better person.More understanding.I want to look at you and see the good things about you.Not look at you and see all your faults.

The Marmalade Reflections of my life lyrics

Listen to the words.This is such a sad song.I wonder what the person who wrote this song was going through at the time?Hope whoever it was things got better for them.

This is for all the lonely people

Like that song by America this is for all the lonely people.Some us will always be lonely I think.In a crowd of thousands we are and can be alone.Why we are like this I don't know.Maybe it's because we don't try hard enough.Maybe it is for some purpose that will be revealed at some unknown time.Maybe then we will understand why this happened to us.Maybe it is of our own choosing.Maybe it is our fears holding us back.Maybe there is a cure for this.A pill from the corner drugstore.That would be wonderful huh.But I am sure the answer and the cure lays inside us.

I am sorry

The Christmas I was 12.I got the gift wanted.My very own Stevens 20 gauge shotgun.Me and Daddy picked it out at a hardware store downtown LaGrange on Bull Street.First time I shot it oh boy did it kick.I had a box of shells Me,Daddy and my Uncle Leon went to a creek and we each took turns shooting it.It was in Macon,Ga where we spent just about every Christmas with Aunt Gladys and Leon.Like every 12 year old I just had to go hunting.So I did.By myself.It was rainy,snowy and cold that day.I went into the woods behind the house.Now to the part I'm not so proud of.No squirrels where seen,so I had to kill something with my shotgun.A poor,helpless not bothering anybody or anything little bird in a tree became my victim.Little bird I have often thought of that day.Please forgive me.

Tis the season...almost

The Christmas season has started.Oh boy.Let me say from the start it is way over done I think.The real reason for the season has long been forgotten.Now it just a commercialized thing.See what they can sell ya.I know,before you call me a heathen or Ebenezer Scrooge, presents,gifts and I want this or I want that is not what it's about.Maybe you still have to have that childlike innocence to really enjoy Christmas.Yep It is Christmas soon.Enjoy and Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Live with it

Ok I might be a little sensitive.Maybe a little insecure.What I am talking about is people who are what is the word I am looking for.Those people who can't see the forest for the trees.People who pea perfume or think they do..People who never think they are wrong.People who think the world revolves around them.Mr or Ms number 1.People who would be shocked to put it mildly if they knew how I really felt about them.Oh well to each his own and like Daddy said if they can live with it I can live without it.

Number 200

This is it folks.Number 200.Post number 200.Wow that is a lot then again thinking back it's not that much.Granted all my little stories are short snippets of my life.It is hard when you think about it to write down these things.Heck people might not even read them but it's my life interesting or just plain boring that is the way it is.I have found out one thing.I like doing this.It is fun.So as long it stays fun I guess if able it will continue.Thanks if you are taking time to read these little stories.It is much appreciated.

Put it in super Daddy

The car was old and no air conditioning.But back then no one really minded.AC was not common like it is now.It was unheard of in houses only places like movie houses had it and they advertised it .The car did have one added feature not found on many.I would lay in the back seat of Daddy's old car.On long trips I would carry a bucket of rocks with me.The floorboard in back was rusted out and from my seat I would drop rocks from the car.Daddy liked big cars.Pontiacs,Buicks cars like that.He had a couple of Oldsmobiles wow those where cars.I remember the 54 Olds Super 88.Two tone color,black and white and a 4 door.Daddy would be passing someone on a 2 lane highway and I would say put it in super Daddy.Super was the passing gear.Them old cars had style and seem so nice today compared to all the cars on the road now.At one time you could tell what make and model a car was.Not today they all look the same.

Sneaking into Church

Sneaking into Church after midnight.Did that once.We Boy Scouts where camping out behind East Newnan Elementary school.It was December and snowing and there was sleet.Tents where leaking and boy talk about cold.This is what we did.There was one large military surplus tent.But it was at the church basement where we had our meetings.It was a Friday and that very day there had been a funeral at the church.How do I know? Well the Church was across the street from the School.I had watched the funeral from my class room.Anyway the large tent that we decided was our best choice because the other 2 or 3 man tents where leaking.Yep it was at the Church.It was cold,dark and snowing.A few volunteers where need to make the long hike to the Church and retrieved the tent.I was always not to smart and volunteered.So a few of us Boy Scouts went,by the way we where poor kids and only 1 guy in our troop had an uniform.Getting to the church late that night our only way of getting in was to open a window and go through the sanctuary.Yep you can guess what was on my mind.The funeral from earlier in the day.We got and quickly shagged back to the camp site.There where 20 or more us and we shared that huge tent with a wood burning stove.It was a night to remember.Camping out,the snow,sleet and the Funeral.

Mayo sandwiches

Mayo sandwiches.I really like them.Mustard sandwiches are great also.Try this little delicacy sometime.Take vanilla wafers and spread mayo on them.Yum talk about good.

My chair is demonic !

I wrote about my power chair the other day.It has been acting up.Well it has been worked on by the girls and is doing much better.There is one slight problem.My chair has a mind of it's own.The chair is demonic I think.Sometimes it will not stop when it's supposed to.It will run you down.Be careful around the chair.They have enough power to knock down doors and drive through walls.Do you remember the movie Christine?It was about an old Plymouth Belverdere that was demonic.Well now my wheelchair seems to be the same way.I was asked the other day if I had a name for my chair.No I never thought about naming it.But since it is now demonic it shall now be called Christine.

Another test?

Up the creek as they say.In a pickle.Dire distress.My wagon is loaded and it's heavy.Going down for the third time.What ever you want to call it go ahead.Ok here is the deal.My @#$@^$$^& wheelchair.I hate this thing.But I need it and it's not working.Fish outta water I am.Try sitting all day in this thing.It is painful.I will not complain.Always someone worse off they say.Maybe it's just a test.I say that alot.What is the test and why ?I don't see the humor in all this myself.So if it is another test will I pass or what?Oh well enough of this for now.

A big stick will solve some problems

Ok while on the subject of being picked on or bullied I will tell this all so true story.Again it was an older kid.Every time he seen me he would cuss me or something just as wonderful.I was 7 or 8 years old.This is what Daddy told me what to do.How to fix the situation.He told me to get a big stick.I did.Sit on the hood of the car which was parked on the street.I did.Wait for this guy to come by the house.He did.When he starts cussing me and whatever and when he reaches the car where I am sitting.He was.And did.Knock him off his bike with the big stick.I did.Guess what?Problem solved and that kid never said another word to me or cause any problems.